Maniac (1980)

 
      Finally got to see maniac! and I was pretty impressed.  The movie was directed by William Lustig and is about this guy Frank who kills girls and scalps them, then takes their scalps and puts them on mannequins in his room.  Basically the guy is a total Maniac, with split personalities and other problems.

      The killings in this movie were pretty over the top.  I thought the scalping scenes in Inglorious Basterds was bad, but this was just as bad, if not worse.  One killing scene in particular that had me rewind and watch again, was when frank was in front of a couples car, and jumped on the hood and straight shot the guys face off with a shotgun. (picture below)

     There were some shots that were really creepy in this film.  One including a POV of the girl getting choked.  So it was just Franks crazy grinning face.  Another shot that stood out to me was when frank was scalping a girl, and there was another POV shot, but this time the blood from the girls forehead dripped down the camera.  I thought that was pretty original.

      Overall I enjoyed it.  The acting was pretty horrible, but it didn't bother me to much. uhmmm yeah, also i thought it was funny, in the bonus material on the dvd, there was a section that highlighted all the horrible quotes from movie critics.  Shows the filmmakers had a good sense of humor with the whole thing.

     Also Frank, the main character, looked almost exactly like Ron Jeremy. haaahaaaaahaaha.  yeah check this movie out if you enjoy senseless killings, brutal killings, psycho killers, EX-CET-TER-AH

I Spit on Your Grave (1978)

      Just got this movie cause they re-released it on blu-ray and it was only $10, so why not!  Overall it wasnt that great. Directed by Meir Zarchi,  Its about this girl from new york who rents a house in the country for the summer, so she can write a book.  While at this house, she gets kidnapped, beat, and raped by four guys. She survives and plans her revenge.  So basically this movie is a pretty big ripoff of Last House on The Left, that was released in 1972. 
     
      It was a pretty eerie movie.  The characters that kidnapped and raped the girl did a good job getting under my skin. I found the rape scenes to be more disturbing than in Last House on The Left, I dont know if the director would find that as a compliment or what.  but yeah the guys were really annoying to watch.  I think the story wasn't planned out to well.  They do all of these horrible things to this girl, without a real reason why. (well one guy gives a reason, but whatever) There was no background info given on the guys. and blahhh blah

 
      I often got bored and annoyed with a lot of the scenes that went on way longer than they should have.  Some in particular consisting of the girl screaming over and over and the guy moaning over and over.  blah blah.  The girls revenge scenes on the guys were pretty good however. One in particular had me cringing real bad. Like Last House on The Left, the second half of the movie is always better than the first half.

      I have yet to check out any of the special features and shiiittt so.. yeah.  I dont know.   Basically go watch this movie if you watched Last House on The Left and thought to yourself, man i wish the girls got raped more!
bleh.

Piranha (2010)

     
      Watched Piranha the other night, directed by Alexandre Aja, and I was pretty impressed.  I put this movie off instantly after seeing the first trailer in theaters.  I assumed it was just some shitty movie, trying to make bank off of the whole 3D thing.  But as I have been appreciating more and more B-Horror movie, and movies with ridiculous plots, I thought id check this out.

      The story is simple, there are these rare piranhas that have come loose from this lake, within a lake... or something like that.  and it just so happens they decide to come loose during spring break, when everyone is partying and going crazy in the water.  So the story is basically trying to get everyone safe, and kill the piranhas.

     The acting was alright, nothing to spectacular.  I enjoyed Paul Sheers character, and I had no idea he was even in this movie, so that was a good surprise.  He played the cameraman to this porno, girls gone wild type movie, and often had funny,stupid lines.  Oh and another reason I wanted to check this out was because I read that Eli Roth had a cameo in it, as a wet tshirt contest host.  So I figured if Eli Roth backs this movie, then it cant be all that bad.

      Overall it was a lot of fun, good movie to watch with a bunch of dudes.  Tons of gore and nudity.  I was actually really impressed with the amount of gore that was in this movie.  The amount of half eaten bodies was pretty intense.  One scene in particular, of a girl getting scalped from getting her hair tangled in the boats propeller was pretty gnarly.  Im not used to all of the CGI gore and shit, so that was pretty different.

     Also, I watched this movie nottt in 3D, and while watching I was constantly thinking, man I bet that would be good in 3D, so I suggest watching it in 3D, if you can.   I dont even know if you can? what hello no what ok peace.

The Burning (1981)

      Watched The Burning, a movie directed by Tony Maylam.  The movie takes place 5 years after a group of kids at a summer camp accidentally set the care taker on fire.  The man who was set on fire was named Cropsy, and he is out to get his revenge on the kids that set him on fire!

      A lot of people probably havent heard of this movie because it was shadowed by the success of Friday the 13th at the time.  Both movies are often related because they both take place at a summer camp, and are both about a madman who is getting his revenge on the present campers.  People say this movie is ripping off Friday The 13th, but apparently the script for this movie was written before Friday The 13th! ho ho hoo.

     This movie was a lot of fun.  The weapon of choice for Cropsy is hedge clippers, which are perfect for brutal killings.  This movie is full of gore, each kill they probably used a gallon of fake blood.  In one scene, the blood was shot across the room hitting a mirror.

     Another gem to this movie was that Jason Alexander was in it.  I had no idea of this going in to this movie, and was pretty surprised.  It turns out it was his first movie haaahaa.  It was funny to see him play the cool/jokester of the group.  The second I recognized him, I was thinking to myself, oh shit I wonder how hes gonna die in this!, unfortunately he lives :(

      The characters were made up of the basic cliche characters for most of the slasher horror movies, cool guy, hot girls, nerdy girls, nerdy guys etc.   One character that stood out was this douche bag named Glazer, he played this muscular guy who thought he was cool shit.  He pissed me off and made me laugh at the same time.  BOO YA.

     IN CONCLUSION, fun movie, its on the instant queue on netflix, if you like 80s slasher movies then check it out, you wont be disappointed.

My Bloody Valentine (1981)

      Watched My Bloody Valentine, a film by George Mihalka.  Overall I was not that impressed.  The movie is about these miners that got buried alive while underground while a valentines day dance was going on, one guy named Harry Warden survived and has killed people every time the town had a valentines day dance.

     I think I enjoyed the idea of this movie more than the story itself. I found the gas mask to be a creepy thing for a killer to wear, and to have him kill people with the pick axe he used while mining was cool.  What WASN'T cool was the killings/deaths of this movie.  Every time someone was about to be killed by Harry Warden the movie would cut out to a different scene, then later on show the outcome of the killings.  The normal horror movie would show everything. 

    Not much else to say, the acting was alright, except for this one girl who freaked the fuck out during all the deaths, but when Harry Warden was right in front of her, she barely reacted. tha fack.  I was convinced one actor was Chris Parnell, but according to IMDB it wasnt! so that sucked. Anyways, watch this movie if you wanna see a wannabe slasher movie, with an okay story.

     My main flaw was with the end, with the killer ending up being Axl.  So why Axl?, because Harry Warden killed his father.  Now what im confused with is, why would Axl want to kill all of his friends because of what Harry Warden did to his father?. Doesn't make any sense, if anything Axl should have hunted down Harry Warden and killed him!  I'm still scratching my head about that one, an hour after watching.

Who Can Kill a Child? (1976)

      Just watched Who Can Kill a Child? (Island of the Damned), a film by Narciso Ibáñez Serrador.  Basically its about this British couple who are on vacation, and decide to sail over to an island off the Spanish coast, which they quickly figure out is completely ran by mad children.

     Overall I really enjoyed this film,  the overall story was good, forcing the question Who Can Kill a Child? and after watching, my answer is ME, I would definitely kill every kid on that island.  Starting with the brat kid fishing and not telling the man what he was fishing for.  It takes a while for the couple to realize this island is ran by kids, it takes a young girl who beats an old man to death with his cane for them to realize something is up.  None of the kids had speaking lines, which I thought was interesting, adding to the mystery of the whole thing.  The kids did a good job pissing off the viewers of this movie.  Everyone of them had this annoying look to them, and every time someone died they would just laugh and run around, which was pretty terrifying.

     The movie begins with footage of the casualties from war, and the people suffering.  And through all the footage, they state how many kids have died during these wars.  The intentions of this were to show that kids basically cant do anything while all the adults around them are fighting for whatever reason, killing everybody.  So basically the movie is showing a bunch of kids who are turning the tables on the situation, and decide to kill all the grown ups.  GENIUS.

     Before viewing the movie, I had the intentions that a movie could not show someone killing a kid, well apparently they can, because the man kills a bunch.  That was weird to me, because obviously its fake, but these kid actors actually had to pretend like they got shot and were bleeding to death, something about that doesn't sit right with me. Also, a scene including a bunch of kids ripping the shirt off a dead woman didn't seem right to me.  Although acting, they are still forced to see and do things that children shouldn't be doing.

     A part I thought was kind of strange was how all the kids could communicate with each other just by staring at each other.  That seemed like the only really impractical part of the movie.  Although I liked how they had the kid communicate with the baby in the woman's stomach in the beginning of the movie, basically telling it to kill her, which it does later in the movie! HA

Pieces (1982)

  
      Pieces is a movie by Juan Piquer Simon, and is about this killer going around this school campus in Boston, killing girls and taking pieces of them in order to piece together a perfect girl!  Now the only reason I heard about this movie is because Eli Roth has stated that it is his all time favorite.

      The story itself was pretty interesting and scary.  To have this crazy killer chopping girls up taking pieces.  I liked how the killer would piece together a puzzle of this naked girl, showing what pieces of real girls he is after next.

      Through the movie you are trying to figure out who the killer is, and the movie gives about 4 suspects including, a student, a janitor, the principal, and this teacher.  I thought it was funny that they didnt really expect anything from the janitor, even though hes the one who is always chopping down trees with a chainsaw etc.  Also a bit that made me laugh was when the teacher was giving a tour to these cops and the teacher brings them to his classroom where he shows them a skull that a former student gave him and he states that its a "16 year old girl skull" bahahaha.  They also hire this blond pro tennis player, to be undercover at the school? or something, all I know is she looked exactly like a young Pamela Anderson. 

     Overall it wasn't that scary, the killings were pretty amusing however.  Id say the scariest part was at the final minute of the movie bahhaaaaaahaahaa. I suggest this movie to horror fans, who like low-budget, stupid-fun horror movies. blah blah BLAH